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It was also something my poor parents could not afford.This stymied my mom and dad. They had never really believed in Santa, but they came to accept that someone was being Santa to me each Christmas morning.As I got older, all my friends stopped believing in Santa, but not me. I kept my belief secret from my friends. They would just tease me and spoil my faith.When I was eleven, I went through puberty. My mother sat me down and spelled out the “Facts of Life”. I learned how babies were made. The only man I wanted to be my mate was Santa.While other girls were dating boys, I kept to myself, making toys. I would fantasize about the big man taking my virginity under the small Christmas tree my father scraped together to buy each year. I would come so hard, I had to bury my face in my pillow, so my parents would not hear.On Christmas Eve, I would drink coffee, to stay up and see Santa. But it didn’t help. I still fell asleep before he arrived. I realized that Santa was not ready to see. Merging again would triple the number of in-built friends each of us had (from one to three). As having one internal best friend was already making my life bearable despite all the bullying, rejection, loneliness, etc., having three best friends would make our life very happy. We doubted the improvement would be linear, but it still had to be MUCH more interesting and fun.Second, going from one mind to two had dramatically improved:My apparent IQ. I knew my real IQ hadn't improved 120 points, but I was still blitzing school whatever the cause.My physical coordination. At least, I thought it had. I wasn't sure of this point, but it seemed likely.I was getting better at understanding people, although I still mostly kept to myself.Would going from two to four minds improve those aspects even further? Maybe even enough to actually get a girlfriend? I made a mental note that if I did merge again, I should avoid doing any more IQ tests! A result of 450 or so might cause trouble.Third, if I.
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